


Spades Slick ==> Reunite with that one kid

by theaxisofidiocy



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Character Study, F/M, Gratuitous happy ending, SlickKat friendship, all of them - Freeform, all the characters are there, slickpaint - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-02
Updated: 2013-12-02
Packaged: 2018-01-03 06:29:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,124
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1067176
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theaxisofidiocy/pseuds/theaxisofidiocy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Your name is Spades Slick<br/>Yes. That is still your name wise guy. You like that name. It is much better than the name you used to have. You are no lowly Jack doomed to the servitude of incompetent royalty. You are the entire suit of spades. King, Queen, Jack, Ace, and all the little numbers combined.<br/>You are also a hero.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Spades Slick ==> Reunite with that one kid

**Author's Note:**

> little experimental non-pesterlog drabble  
> Slick and Karkat reunion  
> they're friends in my brain  
> even though Slick's a jerk  
> Slickpaint still cannon! Hollah!

Your name is Spades Slick

Yes. That is still your name wise guy. You like that name. It is much better than the name you used to have. You are no lowly Jack doomed to the servitude of incompetent royalty. You are the entire suit of spades. King, Queen, Jack, and all the little numbers combined. 

You are also a hero.

You have recently defeated the dreadful Lord English and his reign of assclownery has come to an end. The game is won.

Also about a billion other undoubtedly awesome things have happened, but you're not gonna say what. The moronic orange douche bag has decided to make you all wait like the sadist you always knew he was. You pity the fool who sits there reading this forced to imagine what could possibly have gone down to lead you to this point. Because they can not possibly hope to imagine it. It was just too amazing.

You find yourself on some planet somewhere. You basically have no idea where you are but this does not faze you. You can figure out the whys and wherefores later. All that matters right now is that you have won.

There are a bunch of other so and sos here too that you do not recognize and also some that you do. You hear someone calling out a name that is definitely not yours and you turn around to see who this galloot could be. Oh. It's this kid again. You think you remember this kid. That's right. You like this kid. This kid is OK by you. His hatred is righteous ad his blades are sharp. he is a trustworthy accomplice. You have not seen him for a while and he obviously does not know that you have changed your name. You are going to have to talk to him about that.

And by talk to you of course mean you're going to have to whip out one of your deadly blades and carve it into his lousy melon that there is no way your name has ever or will ever be anything remotely similar to Jack.  
Wait. no.  
Hold the telecommunication device.  
You mean, uh, you will calmly and non violently take the kid aside and explain that you have a new name and you want to leave the dark days represented by your slave name behind you.  
You forgot your new missus doesn't like it when you talk about stabbing people. It makes her little lip quiver. You would hate to make your lady's lip quiver.

The kid is still starring at you looking like a crab out of water. Which is to say like any normal crab ever. No wait. This metaphor isn't working. like a...dog with...no...

Oh. Well now the kid has wrapped his arms around you in a spontaneous and uncomfortable embrace. You suppose this is to be expected as really, all embraces with you are spontaneous and uncomfortable. This is because of the rigid black carapace encompassing your body. It is also because you are just not a very huggy person. Unless your gal wants some cuddling, but you cannot refuse her anything. That reminds you you have to introduce the kid to your gal. That is to say, you have to blatantly flaunt in his face the fact that your dame is the most spectacular dame there ever was, and that you are the king of romantic endeavors. That ought to burn him. You seem to remember this guy being unnaturally enthused by pursuits of a romantic nature. You're getting sidetracked.

The kid is still hugging you tightly and ranting something about thinking you were dead. You decide this was a reasonable assumption, and you sympathize with the kids plight. You are clearly the best and any time spent under the impression that you were not alive must have been truly traumatizing for him. You give him a begrudging pat between the weird little brightly colored carapaces on his head. You never could figure out what those were, or why they didn't spread over the rest of his body in a protective shell like as would be the design of any superior being.

The kid is mumbling something about another you and being betrayed. You are offended by these allusions. You may be a crook, but you are a stand up crook. You are not at all surprised however by the notion of another you. This is the thing about being Jack Noir. There are about a billion Jack Noirs out there. You are not Jack Noir. You are Spades Slick and there is only one of you because you are far too awesome to be duplicated. You decide you hate Jack Noir. The kid hates Jack Noir too. You knew there was a reason you liked this kid. You can talk about how much the other you sucks later, right now you have some petty one-upmanship to attend to.

You glace around for your missus. She's sitting pretty a few yards away looking so gogdamn adorable with her little pail and her slinky green-black dress that does not at all match the silly pink kerchief she has yet to remove. You do not hold it against her. Not everyone can be as fashionable as you. You wave her over and introduce her to your old friend.

The kid is pleased to meet her. Of course he is. He clearly can barely contain his jealousy. You have the best gal. This is because you are the Casanova. It is you.

He offers to introduce you to his motley crew of idiots over there. You are of course about to say no because there are clearly far too many of them. Aside from this guy you count 23 more gray kids, 8 of those pink fleshy things, a green skeleton, a dopey looking carapace with a rather swanky mayoral sash and a weird carapace dog thing with wings, who is...sort of attractive you guess, if you're into that sort of thing which you are not. You get another reproachful glare from the missus. She's always saying you should be more accommodating around people of a friendly persuasion. You're really more of a stab first do nice things for people later kind of guy, but she thinks she can change you. She is probably correct. Aw damn, you can already see her little lip starting to quiver. Cunning minx knows exactly what she is doing to you. You say lead the way. The kid leads the way over to the enormous mob of idiots who appear to be making plans for a big we killed the giant green asshole blowout.

This is going to be a long night.


End file.
